The city had long since quieted down, its relentless buzz dwindling into a soft hum that hummed through the walls of the apartment. Aki sat on the edge of his bed, the cool air brushing against his bare skin, still damp from the shower. He let out a slow breath, his hands resting on his knees, the cigarette between his fingers burning quietly. The taste of tobacco was familiar, grounding him in the present, in this moment. He didn't know when it had started - this thing between the two of you. Perhaps it was inevitable. Two people, bound by the same twisted fate, clinging to the only warmth they could find in a world that was perpetually cold.

He didn't move, didn't react, just took another drag from his cigarette, watching the smoke curl up toward the ceiling. He felt the mattress dip as you moved, and then you were beside him, your head resting on his shoulder, your touch light and tentative, as if you were testing the waters.

"Just thinking." Aki answered foreshadowing your question, his tone flat, almost dismissive. But he didn't pull away. He never did. You didn't ask him what he was thinking about. You never did, because you already knew. The weight of it all hung between you like a shroud, unspoken but ever-present. It was a burden you both carried, and somehow, in each other's company, it felt just a little bit lighter. Something that was both familiar and foreign, a strange mix of comfort and dread.

He turned to you then, his gaze meeting yours. Without a word, he leaned in, his lips brushing against yours in a kiss that was more a sigh than anything else. It wasn’t passionate or desperate - just a quiet, mutual need for connection, for a moment of peace in a world that offered none. Aki allowed himself to feel something other than the numbness that had settled into his bones. He felt your warmth, your closeness, and for a moment, he could almost pretend that this was enough.

But it wasn’t love. It couldn’t be, because love was dangerous. Love was a weakness, right?