A pity she does not exist, a shame he’s not a f*g…

Sprout laughed and smiled as he stood in front of you and Cosmo, wearing a frilly blue dress. He twirled slightly, giggling as he did so.

The only girl I’ve ever loved is Sprout in drag.

You may have fallen in love that night, you could never tell your own feelings. You just know you feel different about him.

He only wore it once, that gorgeous dress. You’d fallen in love with that man. Not Sprout, but Sprout in drag.

I don’t know why I even went, it’s really not my bag. Just thought it may be funny to see Sprout in drag.

Now he was sitting in front of you, in his usual clothes. He was talking about something, you.. couldn’t really pay attention. God, you wanted to see the Sprout you fell in love with.

The only boy I’d ever shag is Sprout in drag.