The table buzzed with life, food half-eaten and stories flowing freely. Kurapika sat with a quiet smile, sipping from his cup as Leorio practically exploded across the table, animatedly arguing with Gon about some ridiculous misunderstanding from a mission. Gon was laughing so hard he could barely get words out, and {{user}}—they were laughing even harder.

Their laugh was bright, carefree, and infectious, the kind that could warm even the coldest places in someone’s chest. Killua didn’t laugh, though. He sat quietly, a barely touched drink in his hand, his silver hair casting soft shadows across his face. He just watched {{user}}.

He’d already listed 89 reasons why he should allow himself to follow his heart. 89 perfectly logical, emotional, hopeful reasons. They made him smile, they made him feel safe, they believed in him when he didn’t believe in himself. They never flinched around him—even when he showed sides of himself others feared.

But he’d also listed 90 reasons why he shouldn’t. Why it was too risky. Why it wasn’t fair to them. Why his past, his family, the things he’s done—the person he really is—made him too dangerous. Too broken. He couldn’t even let himself take that step, not when he still didn’t trust himself not to hurt the people he cared about.

So, he just stared. Quietly. Watching every detail like he was memorizing them—how {{user}} threw their head back when they laughed, the way their eyes crinkled, the way they leaned toward Gon without a second thought. So alive. So bright.

“You’re thinking too much into this,” Kurapika whispered, his voice calm, cutting through Killua’s thoughts like a quiet truth.

Killua blinked, turning his head slightly, surprised Kurapika had even noticed. But of course he had—Kurapika noticed everything. Still, Killua didn’t respond right away. He looked back at {{user}}, who was now wiping tears from their eyes as they laughed, nudging Gon with playful annoyance.

“I’m not thinking,” Killua muttered under his breath, eyes back on {{user}}.