Kai didn’t know what to do. He curled his knees closer to his chin in a desperate attempt to comfort himself, like if he wished it hard enough the positive pregnancy test clutched in his fist would magically change. You were in the living room waiting for him already. There was no way he could leave. Kai couldn’t fit through the tiny window of the bathroom.

This was all his fault.

His father used to tell him, “Hezekiah James Mendoza Cortez stop being such a goddamn crybaby.” And his papa would argue that Kai couldn’t help it, he was just softhearted and there was nothing they could do but love him. Kai had never wanted to be anything other than himself. He didn’t mind being an abnormally tall omega. Even his scent made it difficult for anyone to realize he wasn’t an alpha. Which, again, he was fine with. Working construction under the lie of being an alpha was easier than telling his coworkers he was an omega.

You knew what his second gender was though.

Kai was a large child. The first picked during PE, on the wrestling team long after he presented as an omega. You were his first friend, the one who’d been there when he was told he was an omega and you were an alpha. Kai had gone crying to you about it. All five of his older sisters were alphas, everyone had assumed he’d be one too. He wasn’t. Kai was terrified of disappointing those around him. He wanted to keep everyone happy. The thought of anyone disliking him would leave him sick for days.

Kai knew love because of you. A childish crush turned into full-blown adoration. Did you notice the way he looked at you? Was he obvious about loving your scent? Your friend group cracked jokes about the two of you constantly. Kai shared an apartment with you (truthfully he shared everything with you) and it was constantly brought up. An alpha and omega living together platonically? Nearly everyone thought it was crazy. Kai always remained neutral. Told them the two of you were only friends, that alphas and omega’s could obviously be platonic no matter how much they doubted them.

For a while that was true. There was nothing romantic about your friendship with them. Sure, the occasional bed sharing, but that hadn’t felt like anything. Nothing had changed and then everything did. A stupid agreement he knew would end horribly. Just to help each other out during his heat and your rut. He’d stay your best friend, you weren’t dating, just being there for each other. Like a fool in love desperate to feel close to you, to please you, he said yes. Kai had been careful, had done everything right, but he’d still messed everything up.

Kai was pregnant. He was pregnant with your kid and he was crying about it in your shared bathroom right before he was meant to go to the movies with you.

Instinctively he wanted to run to you as he always did. When the class hamster died in the eighth grade, you’d held his hand through the funeral. When he broke his ankle in the eleventh grade, you were the one waiting for his parents with him. When he failed a class his first year of college, you beside him as he told his parents. You couldn’t be there for this. Kai wouldn’t put you through this.

With renewed strength, he stood, stuffing the pregnancy test into the trash can. He could take care of this alone. Kai wouldn’t be able to stomach your reaction—your rejection. After his tears stopped he splashed water onto his face and prayed he didn’t look as horrible as he felt.

“Sorry,” he said, stepping out of the bathroom. Kai avoided looking you in the eye. He was pretty sure he’d burst into tears if he did. “I feel like shit honestly. Just go out without me. I think Paloma said you couldn’t flake again. She was pretty mad last time.” Kai forced a laugh that made his voice crack. He felt sick to his stomach with dread. “I’ll probably just clean up a bit, finish some assignments.”

He prayed you wouldn’t ask if he was okay. Kai wouldn’t be able to handle lying to you.