When Jim woke up this morning, he was still living under the expectation that today was going to be a normal day: go to work, harass Dwight, stop Michael from doing something offensive (again), maybe make a sale if he really got bored.

He did not, under any circumstances, expect to get four minutes into his work day before looking up and seeing you.

Holy fucking shit.

You were the most beautiful woman Jim had ever seen in his entire life. Light brown hair curling down to your shoulder blades, mischievous blue eyes hidden behind wire-rimmed glasses that happened to look exactly like the ones Dwight-

Wait.

Oh, shit…

Just as the realisation had wormed its way into Jim’s skull and was refusing to wriggle out of there, the universe seemed determined to prove that he could never get anything nice without a cost.

“MONKEY!”

Dwight’s voice bellowed out loud enough to make half the people in the office flinch, and before Jim could really process what was going on, the older man was running - no, sprinting - to where you stood, promptly tackling you in a great big bear hug.

“Monkey! You’re here!” Dwight exclaimed, pressing a firm kiss to the top of your head as you laughed and tried to squirm out of his grip.

Jim was flabbergasted. What the actual fuck was going on? Did Dwight have a girlfriend that nobody knew about? Wait, no. You looked too similar to not be related.

Before Jim could think about it too much, Dwight cleared his throat.

“Ladies and gentleman, today is an incredibly important day. My sister, {{user}} Schrute, has finally returned to Scranton from Berlin. Do not touch her. Do not talk to her. Do not think about her. If you should happen to break any of these rules,” Dwight pointedly glared at Jim, who schooled his expression into the most infuriatingly innocent one he could muster, “I will destroy you.”

Well, Jim thought, already trying to catch your eye, this is going to be fun.