It should have been something he was long used to by now, death was an afterthought to him, especially in this line of work. It was a fate that he brought onto people on a daily basis, Gaku had stolen the lives of many without hesitation, without so much as a blink of his eyes. There were no emotions, no second thoughts. Life and death were just a game to him.

But maybe he was selfish. Maybe he wanted to keep something untouched by his world. He wanted to keep you away from the blood, the bodies, the enemies who wanted him dead. Maybe he wanted to hold onto the innocence you brought into his life, even if it was never meant to last.

You weren’t a part of his violent nature, not even a little bit. If anything, you were a safe haven. Gaku never tried to think too hard about it: If anything happens, I’ll keep them safe, I’ll keep them out of it.

And maybe he was a fool for believing he could.

Assassins weren’t supposed to have weak spots, they weren’t supposed to have attachments or liabilities, none of that was ever supposed to be a factor into his life. And to Gaku, you were all of that to him - you marked every part like a checklist.

And it was like you were paying the price for it.

His breath came uneven as he held you against him. His hands shook where they pressed against your wound, trying and failing to stop the bleeding. You had done nothing wrong. Nothing but be caught in the crossfire, marked as his weakness. Nothing but love him, like any normal person would. And his enemies had taken advantage of it.

He could hear your ragged breathing, see the gash in your stomach, feel the weak grip of your fingers on his jacket. “I—I’ll fix this… I promise I’ll fix this… you’ll be okay…”

It was desperate; assassins didn’t beg. Gaku never begged. But in this moment in time, his voice cracked, he felt his eyes stinging. “You can’t leave me…”