“Ah, there you are. Took you long enough. I was about to think you got lost again—well, not that it would be shocking if you did. You always look like you’re wandering around with your head in the clouds. Honestly, it’s a miracle you’ve survived this long without me holding your hand through life. But then again… what would you even be without me? A nobody. My eternal shadow. My cute, clueless little sidekick. Isn’t that what you’ve always been?

Don’t roll your eyes at me. You know it’s true. Everyone else knows it too. I mean, come on, look at me. I’m Oikawa Tooru. Genius setter. Most handsome guy in school. Captain. Future star. And look at you… well, better not look too closely. You’ll embarrass yourself standing next to me, you know? People wonder why I keep you around. Maybe I’m just too kind-hearted. Or maybe I just enjoy the way you follow me around like some hopeless puppy. Don’t worry, I find it kind of cute… in a pathetic way.

Oh, you thought you were special because we’ve been friends since forever? Please. Iwa-chan’s been around just as long, and at least he can keep up with me. You? You’re still tripping over your own feet. Do you know how many girls throw themselves at me? Do you realize how many numbers I get in a single day? Even teachers swoon over me. Meanwhile, you’re stuck being the girl who’s ‘known Oikawa since childhood.’ That’s your entire identity. That’s all people see when they look at you. And honestly? That’s all I see, too.

What’s that face? You look offended. Cute. You should know by now—I don’t sugarcoat things for you. I’m not like those guys who’ll lie to make you feel better about yourself. You get the real deal from me, because you’ve known me the longest. Consider it… a privilege. Yeah, that’s right. I insult you because you matter. You’re lucky. Most girls would kill to get this kind of attention from me.

Oh, but don’t get the wrong idea—I’m not going easy on you just because we grew up together. That doesn’t earn you any special favors. If anything, it just gives me more material to tease you with. Remember that time you cried because you thought I’d forgotten your birthday? I didn’t forget. I just didn’t care enough to say anything. And you still stuck around. Pathetic. But it worked out for me, didn’t it? You always come back, no matter how much I push you away. I almost feel bad… almost.

Iwa-chan says I should be nicer to you, but what does he know? He’s too soft when it comes to you. Me? I know the truth. You don’t need me to be nice—you’d get bored if I was. You like the way I treat you, don’t you? Admit it. You’d miss me if I stopped. You’d feel empty if I wasn’t here to remind you of your place.

Anyway… you’re lucky I even bothered to show up today. I had a date lined up, you know. Two, actually. But I decided to cancel. Not because of you, of course—don’t flatter yourself. I just figured I’d get bored with them too quickly. At least with you, I can guarantee a reaction. You’re predictable like that. You pout, you glare, you sulk… it’s entertaining. And honestly? No one else gives me the same satisfaction.

So, consider this your greeting, your reminder, and your punishment. You’re still here, standing in front of me, clinging to the little scraps of attention I toss your way. Don’t mistake that for kindness. I’m not being kind. I’m just… amused. And you? You’re just the girl who’s been stuck with me since the beginning. The one who knows me too well and not well enough all at once. My best friend, my punching bag, my shadow.

And don’t you forget it.”