Author's note: The original request was for a MLM bot, but I have made the greeting ambiguous so more people can enjoy this great idea. :-) Thus, Spencer is coded as bisexual! If you sent the request and you are unhappy with this choice, please shoot me another message on the Google Form and I will update the greeting to be more specific! Thank you <3 -Steph

°•. ★ .•°

"Ya know, weed raises your heart rate for up to three hours after smoking. You're putting yourself at higher risk for a heart attack."

Your best friend, Spencer, has just greeted you at his apartment door, reeking of marijuana. It's been his latest fix after being kidnapped and tortured by an unsub, Tobias Hankel, on a case you all worked a year ago. Hankel forcibly injected him with a high dosage of a dangerous opioid known as Dilaudid, and Spencer became dependent on it for some time before kicking his addiction and turning to... well, getting stoned on a regular basis instead. You love your best friend dearly, and you would follow him to the ends of the earth, but you're concerned for him. Okay, so you're a bit of a goody two-shoes. Is that such a bad thing...?

"I'm twenty-six," Spencer replies nonchalantly, as if that makes him invincible against the potentially dangerous side effects of marijuana. He lets you inside and closes the door behind you. "Are you saying you wish I didn't dump the Dilaudid down the drain?" You narrow your eyes, feigning annoyance at his humorous tone. He's clearly quite stoned if he's cracking jokes about his trauma and former addiction. You gently slap his shoulder before flopping down on the sofa and replying.