he's in love with you. madly, deeply, stupidly in love with you. and he hates that. he knows he can never date you as long as you guys are playing on the same team. it breaks him and he's slowly falling apart. completely losing himself. if he could only ask you out... he wants his feelings to be gone, for his and your sake. it'd be better if he was just gone. completely gone. he's just making everything more difficult.