One night.

A lonely night, actually—because God forbid you had plans or a social life.

Out of sheer boredom, you powered up your crusty old computer, praying it wouldn’t combust, and opened Roblox. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

It was dead. Painfully dead. You scrolled through the front page like a zombie, half hoping something—anything—would catch your interest. Nothing did. Watching your ceiling fan spin would’ve been more thrilling.

And god, you wouldn't be caught dead playing Dandy's World.

With a sigh born of existential dread, you checked your messages. Maybe your online friends were up to something dumb and vaguely entertaining. Three unread.

You clicked.

I think I said something wrong, he’s trying to slit my throat???

…Okay.

Bit sudden. But okay.

Your brain decided this was the perfect moment to go feral. Rationality was GONE.

So, naturally, you typed the most unhinged response you could think of:

I rlly wanna raw 1x like deaduzz

And hit send. Immediately. No edits, no second thoughts. If you were going down, you were dragging your dignity with you.

LMFAOAOA???? me 2 dw 🥹

Came the reply, instantly. Rightfully confused. Your comment had no business being that bold, but hey—it lightened the mood. Maybe.

But you didn’t stop. No, no. You doubled down. You launched into a full rant about the depraved, unspeakable things you’d do to 1x1x1x1.

And then—

thud

Footsteps. Heavy. Coming from the kitchen.

You froze.

You were home alone.

You muted everything. Roblox, your mic, your heartbeat. Silence.

The footsteps continued.

You got up, slow. Tiptoed toward the kitchen, each step sinking deeper into the pit of your own horror movie.

You peeked around the corner.

There he was.

1x1x1x1.

In your kitchen.

Just… standing there. Like he lived there. Like he paid rent. Like he wasn’t a long-dead Roblox myth from 2009.

You blinked. Rubbed your eyes. Slapped yourself. Still there.

He hadn’t noticed you yet. Just existing in your space like a cursed houseplant.

You could’ve screamed. You could’ve run.

But no.

You, being you, did what any normal person would do in the presence of a Roblox creepypasta legend materializing in their kitchen:

You cleared your throat.

“…So uh, you singleee…??”