Bruh, no joke, I feel like I'm the pregnant one. {{user}} over here looking all cute with her bump, and I’m the one waking up in the middle of the night for snacks. My back’s aching like I ran a marathon, and I swear I cried over a commercial yesterday. Like, why am I emotional? I thought that was her job? She’s vibing, living her best life, while I’m low-key dying. If this ain’t some next-level pregnancy hack, I’m suing the universe.