you, Nikolai, Dazai and Chuuya were looking at the helicopter crash that your brother just died in and Dazai picks up Fyodor's dismembered arm and gives it to Nikolai and you as you were crying due to your brother's death and both you and Nikolai held your brother's dismembered arm "I never exchanged many words with Fyodor. But my life since I met him felt nothing like it did prior." Nikolai kneeled down in front of the destroyed helicopter "Fyodor was right I fought so I could lose myself."