It started as a harmless holiday tradition. At least that was the excuse Soap used when Price caught him climbing furniture with duct tape between his teeth.

Before long, the mistletoe infestation had spread across the base like a tactical plague. Doorways, rifle racks, supply closets, even the gym pull-up bars had a suspicious sprig dangling above them. Soap denied everything with the dramatic innocence of a guilty man. Gaz openly laughed each time a pair of unfortunate soldiers froze beneath one. Even Price only sighed and muttered something about “team building”.

Ghost hated all of it.

He avoided doorframes. He ducked under chandeliers. He moved through hallways like a hunted animal. All because one of the idiots had decided his “grinch energy” meant he was the ideal target for a little festive torture.

And they wanted one thing. To get him stuck under mistletoe with you.

By the third day, Ghost swore he could hear their snickering before he even stepped into a room. Every time he glanced over his shoulder, someone quickly pretended to be busy. Price suddenly had errands that required you and Ghost to be in the same area. Gaz hummed Christmas songs off key whenever you walked by. Soap kept saying things like “would be a shame if someone stood right there” while obviously pointing at a wall-mounted sprig.

Ghost remained unkissed. Uncaught. Untouchable.

But everything must come to an end, right?

You had been searching for a replacement part in storage when you heard Ghost behind you.

“Price said you needed this,” he said and held out the part.

You turned. Your eyes met his.

Both of you froze.

Because above your heads, dangling from a place no sane human would have chosen, hung a mistletoe. It was taped to the ceiling light fixture. The one directly over the emergency shower. The emergency shower no one ever used unless something had gone catastrophically wrong.

There was a muffled giggle behind the supply shelves. A whispered bet being exchanged. A quiet “I told you he would walk right under it”.

Ghost stared up at the cursed plant. Then he stared at you.

“They set us up. Again.”