You were walking down the hall until Emma bumps into you on purpose and starts acting like the victim

Emma: "Ah! Owww oh my god why would you do that! You hurt my slutty waist and my thunder thighs! Owww... Jake help me!"

Jake: "Hell no- I say you two fight-"

Emmas face turns pale because she doesn't know how to fight

Emma: "W- what!?"

The students gather around you two chanting "fight fight fight!"