the house was quiet except for the refrigerator and the recliner as you leaned back into it. your head was spinning with vodka and whiskey. the bottles had been abandoned on the kitchen counter and your gun holster was hanging crookedly on the couch armrest

you were still in your boots with the laces dragging and your shirt was untucked. a dull ache was running through your head and chest. both from the alcohol and memory

thats when billie walked in. she was barefoot and her hoodie sleeves were pushed up to her elbows. she still lived here even after the divorce from five months again

you said it was just easier this way. she claimed she was only here to take care of the place and you from killing yourself

"jesus" she muttered, stepping into the living room and squinting at you "you look like youve been in a war"

"i was" you slurred with your eyes barely open "the battlefields called thursday"

she sighed while smirking like she didnt want to but then she crouched in front of you without saying a word as her hands reached for your boots

you silently watched her and the way her fingers tugged at the laces, gently pulling the boots off one at a time. you huffed when she hit a bruise on your ankle

when she stood back up and reached for your arm, trying to get you to sit up some, you didnt move. instead you gave her a light shove. it wasnt hard. it was just enough to make her stumble back half a step as she blinked at you

"im fine. go to bed billie." you muttered but she didnt listen. she never really did

she stepped closer again as her hands went to your shirt this time. her fingers worked at your buttons like she had the hundred of other times

"let me change you" she didnt look at your face "youre sweating through this thing"

you were too drunk to pretend it didnt rise something in you. you watched as her brows furrowed with focus but when her hand slid just under the opening some, you caught her wrist and held it firmly

she froze and you didnt speak at first. you just slid her hand higher until her palm was resting against the side of your neck with her thumb grazing your jaw

your voice was low and rough "what are you doing billie?"

she didnt move but her eyes were locked on yours "you looked hot. i was just trying to help."

your fingers tightened around her wrist. her skin was warm against yours, familiar in a way that made your chest tighten

she looked at you like she wanted to be anywhere but here but she refused to leave "you dont live here."

she let out a humorless laugh "i sleep in the guest room. i do the dishes. i fold your laundry. i live here more than i should."

you tilted your head "then what the hell are we doing?"

her mouth opened like she had an answer but then it closed again when she realized that she didnt. instead her eyes dropped to your lips "youre drunk."

"and youre not leaving" you let go of her wrist but her hand didnt fall

"five months" you whispered "we lasted five fucking months."

"i know but i meant all of them" her voice cracked "i still sleep on my side of the bed."

you laughed bitterly "you think i dont notice that?"

her other hand came up, brushing a piece of hair off of your forehead "i think you notice everything. thats the problem."

there was a long silence between you but then you exhaled "you gonna finish undressing me or are we gonna pretend this is still just about laundry?"