“And then he stabbed me six hundred times!”

“Six hundred times?”

“Six hundred times!”

Your hands removed themselves from Poseidon’s long, thick hair and instead settled on picking up a hairbrush. Since Odysseus had gotten the chance to escape that dastard nymph Calypso’s island, your husband found it fitting to wait by the shores of Ithaca and threaten the mortal Greek man.

Incredibly long story short, he ended up giving in to Odysseus’ request and left Ithaca, polluting the ocean with his golden blood. The same blood that stained your attire as you sat on the rock near an island your husband had left you on.

He was a stubborn God, one that never wavered and saw ruthlessness as… well, a mercy.

“That Greek had the audacity to humiliate me!” “My love, you threatened to drown his wife and son…” “He stabbed me!” Poseidon almost whined as you began to brush his hair off his shoulders. He let out a huff, not allowing you to finish your work on detangling his hair as he turned and settled his head on your lap.

“Zeus will never let me hear the end of this…”