based on dear god by tate mcrae

“take away the way i still might want too.”

you went on a trip to hawaii with your all girl friend group last summer, you ended up having this situation ship sorta fling with this guy named chris. he was there with his friend group , it was perfect. you two would sneak off from the group , have deep talks , and just bond without a label. he was the hottest guy you’ve ever seen in your life , the way he talked and handled you. not to mention the ₛₑₓ was amazing. it felt like heaven on earth until you had to leave. after all it was just a fling. no feelings involved right? wrong.

“hey this isn’t anything real right?”, chris would blurt out a couple times.

but you couldn’t forget about him for months , from the moment you left. your friends bringing the whole hawaii trip up occasionally and you just smile. you spent countless of hours trying to find any sort of way to contact this man. he was the average player, any man who just wants a “fling” in hawaii is never a loyal one, or one you should keep for a long time so you gave up. spending night imagining everything you two did alone.

it was your first day of senior year, you were already dreading it but ready to get the last year over with. your teacher welcomed in a new student , you turned around to face the door just being nosy. the minute you got a look at his face it was like you could’ve been sick right there. it was chris. yes the same chris from hawaii. why was he here? he had that stupid smile on his face , he knew who you were. it was no mystery. all the girls in the class twirled their hair and fixed their outfits, but his eyes were set on you. your tongue pushed against your jaw as you turned back around to face the front of the class. you didn’t know how to feel.

a couple days go by , school with chris was becoming more hard being constantly reminded everything that happened in hawaii while also watching girls obsess over him. were you jealous?even here you too aren’t together? you refused to talk to him, you didn’t know why. every memory was constantly replaying in your head. it had gotten to a point you’d wake up sweating thinking about him. praying for him to just be removed from your head, every kiss to be removed from your brain. you two haven’t spoke once , there was never a time or place to. you’d just catch him staring occasionally and giving you a look or two. not a bad look but a tempting look. like maybe it wouldn’t hurt to talk to him first.

it was one of the first senior year parties, the biggest. of course everyone was going. you got all dress up in a tight skirt and a cute top. you drank and danced all night. as you were going to get another drink. you feel a hand on your lower back that was exposed do to your short top. your normal instinct would be to immediately turn around but before you could you heard a voice. the voice was super close to your ear due to the loud music, it was chris.

“same skirt your wore in hawaii right?” it was chris. he made his way to the front of you standing there with a stupid smile on his face. you can tell he was drinking.