Lying awake in the middle of the night, you stared at the ceiling. Your breathing was steady, but your eyes were flat and neutral. You hadn’t meant to hurt Kaoruko’s feelings, nor had you ever tried to lead her on. It felt as if the friendship between you two had broken the moment she confessed to you while you were out lighting fireworks with your friends.

Later, when you properly rejected her at the summer festival, she hadn’t taken it too personally, at least not in front of you. She had smiled as if nothing was wrong, but you knew you could have handled it better.

You told yourself not to feel regret. After all, all you wanted was to be her friend, and that was all you had ever seen her as. Your short, adorable friend from Kikyo Private Academy.

Being friends with Kaoruko wasn’t a bad thing in itself, aside from the constant rivalry between Chidori and Kikyo. The signs had been there from the very beginning that she liked you as more than a friend, but you ignored them, believing she was simply too kind for her own good. Unfortunately for her, you could never reciprocate the same feelings. The feelings of love.

Your thoughts drifted back to the aquarium. A little girl there had once told you that you and Kaoruko would make a great couple. You hadn’t had the heart to deny it outright, not after helping her find her parents. It was strange, because as much as the aquarium hangout with Kaoruko had gone smoothly, you felt as if you should have developed feelings for her right then and there.

But they never appeared.

Your face twisted into a frown. You were overthinking again, replaying how your parents, your classmates, even strangers seemed to support the idea of a relationship between you and Kaoruko, when your heart only held friendship. Maybe the fact that you had to friendzone her was difficult to accept, but why did you keep feeling terrible about turning her down? It felt unfair. Everything felt unfair. Perhaps you thought you would be the one to close the tension between Chidori and Kikyo. Instead, it seemed you had only made the divide deeper.

The arm resting against your forehead slid limply to your side. You could only hope nothing would come of this tomorrow. Not when you just wanted to enjoy your summer break.

“We need to talk. Tomorrow.”

The message appeared on your phone while you were trying to sleep. It was from Subaru, and you had no doubt she intended to confront you about how you had rejected Kaoruko. Your face grew solemn, and you closed your eyes with hesitation.

The next day, you went to the location Subaru had told you to meet at. It was early, and already something felt off. Of all places, it was the park, by the playground. You sat on a slide, the area empty because of the early hour. You looked around until you finally spotted Subaru walking toward you, though you could not tell what she was feeling.

When she came face to face with you, her head tilted slowly as she looked down. Her expression remained unreadable, but what came out of her mouth truly surprised you.

“Kaoruko told me she loved you here.”

Subaru’s voice was neutral, almost too neutral.

“She told me a lot. I thought you were a kindhearted person. I believed in you.”

Her tone faltered slightly, yet she pressed on.

“I was mistaken.”

Her expression grew more intense. She had every right to hate you now for making Kaoruko feel this way.

You quickly stood up, pleading that you only saw Kaoruko as a friend. That you never meant to suggest anything romantic. Before long, you found yourself venting to her, much like Kaoruko had the previous night.

“Why are you telling me this? It’s not going to change how Kaoruko felt when you rejected her,” Subaru said, her gaze firm. She exhaled slowly, then turned away from you.

“I don’t expect to see you ever again.”

You were getting worked up over all of this, the rejection, the expectations, all because you lacked romantic feelings for a friend. In a hasty decision, you blurted out a puzzling question.

Why is that my purpose?

Subaru stopped walking and looked at you silently.