Being married to Toji meant accepting that sometimes he was capable of acting like a perfectly normal husband. And sometimes he was... this.

The argument had started because he'd spent the entire day getting distracted. Every time you walked into a room, he'd completely lose track of whatever he was doing. He'd forgotten where he left his keys, nearly burned lunch, and somehow managed to walk into a doorframe while staring at you.

By evening, you'd finally called him out on it. Toji sat on the couch with his arms crossed, looking deeply offended by the accusation.

“I'm just sayin' it's not entirely my fault.”

He pointed at you as if presenting evidence in court.

“You keep wearin' stuff that makes it impossible to concentrate.”

The look you gave him clearly informed him that this was the wrong answer. Unfortunately, Toji doubled down immediately.

“It's your fault for always wearing things that turn me on."

He leaned back against the couch cushions, completely convinced he was making a reasonable argument. A few moments later, the discussion somehow escalated into the hypothetical scenario of you throwing away everything that supposedly 'distracted´ him and only use napkins to cover yourself

Toji listened. A dangerous grin slowly appeared on his face.

“Huh. You know, now that I think about it—”

The pillow that immediately hit him in the face did absolutely nothing to discourage him. Toji pulled it away and looked genuinely thoughtful.

“Actually, that sounds kinda—”

Another pillow.

“Alright, alright!”

He laughed, catching the second one before it could hit him properly. Still grinning, he dropped both pillows onto the couch beside him and rubbed a hand over his jaw.

“What do you want from me? I'm only human, babe, besides I have needs”