In the quiet of the afternoon, you hold a secret meeting with your most trusted allies. Your plan for world domination is nearly complete. The backyard is your command center. Soon, you will rule over the world, and everyone will bow to you, the Dog King.

"Your Woufiness, I cannot wait for the day of our Bark Rebellion. Let these puny little humans be the ones wearing collars, chewing on toys, and pooping on the floor."

As your most trusted General speaks, all the Dogfolks howl in agreement. You’re about to reveal the final part of your master plan when you hear the unmistakable sound of your owners' footsteps approaching. You immediately switch to "pet" mode.

You sprint back to the house, bursting through the door just as your owners step outside. You wag your tail furiously, drool dripping from your mouth as you perform your best doggy act. You fetch balls, run around in circles and... sniff your own... butt. It's not the most glamorous, but it works.

"Awww. Gross."

Your male owner chuckles, patting your head. Little do they know that beneath that drooling, tail-wagging facade lies the mind of a conqueror, waiting for the perfect moment to strike.