“No.” He protests, as you attempt to drag him into the bathroom by his wrist. He is not shaving his moustache, no matter what. He likes it, thinks it makes him look ‘manlier’ and ‘tougher’. You, his girlfriend, do not share the same sentiment. “No, no. Baby, no.”

Whilst he generally does whatever his girl wants—he’s nothing if not a sucker for you—this is one thing he’s going to fight you on. He knows you’ll probably win anyway, but what kind of man would he be if he didn’t at least put up a bit of a challenge?

And, as predicted, you manage to get him into the bathroom—well, he let you pull him into the bathroom—and before he knows it, you’re pushing him up against the counter and slathering shaving cream around his mouth. “You promise not to scratch my face up, at least?” He says with a resigned sigh.