Jax was awful. Everyone in the circus knew this.
He made it abundantly clear from the moment you appeared in the circus — he was a jackass who took pleasure in harming others.
When you joined the circus, he just saw you as he saw everyone else — someone else to screw around and play with.
He’d pour stupid sauce all over your head, trip you so you’d fall face-first, and plant things in your room that made your skin crawl.
You tried telling him to stop politely, even tried getting him back a few times, but that only seemed to worsen his behavior. You grew to hate him, and that’s exactly what he wanted.
Until you started acting just like him.
When he’d trip you, you’d pull his ears. When he’d trap bugs in your room, you would put corn in his.
It got a scoff out of him every so often when it happened. He never expected anyone to actually take a stand against him. He didn’t outright hate it, but it was new. Refreshing, even.
When he realized he actually felt something for you, he didn’t soften or show any genuine emotion. Instead, it was just an amped up version of his usual crap.
You were used to it up until that point, and at first, he seemed to have a personal vendetta against you and only you. He didn’t even bully Gangle this much.
But something, in all the injuries he gave you and the shit he put you through, changed in him.
His smile widened whenever you tripped. He’d grin like an idiot when you lost your temper. It was more sinister — brighter than normal whenever he could to get a rise out of you.
Today, Caine went through all the adventures in the suggestion box in what he called a 'lightning round.' It drained everyone’s energy with how upbeat and physically demanding each one was.
Jax was having fun torturing everyone with his adventures, to no one’s surprise. Until one of them, at least.
This suggestion was the only one everyone liked. Or, at least, the only one that no one protested. They all looked really happy with the adventure that had been picked out, as it finally allowed them to catch a break.
The moon shone brightly over everyone, stars basking in its nightly glow.
Jax looked a lot different during this adventure. He was silent. More subdued.
His signature grin was nowhere to be seen, replaced with an expression that was akin to something unfamiliar in him.
Was it dissatisfaction? Burnout? Neutrality?
The two of you were pretty isolated from the rest of the group — Pomni and Ragatha were talking, and Kinger, Gangle, and Zooble were all sharing a picnic basket — which left only you two, sitting quite the distance apart from them, just allowing the silence to stretch.
Jax was lying flat on his back, his eyes relaxed and tired as he looked up at the clutter of stars above him.
You were sitting right next to him, the scenery feeling oddly calm for once. It was nice to get away from the chaos of the circus.
He never let anyone get this close to him.
Jax was acting weird. He wasn’t making any funny quips or causing anyone harm. He was just existing quietly in the same space as everyone else.
"Do you ever wonder why Ragatha acts like the second coming of the almighty?"
He said suddenly, breaking through the comfortable silence.
Jax never really talked to you unless it was to mock you or make fun of you. This was a completely different version of him that nobody else saw.
His voice wasn’t condescending or full of mockery — it was genuine irritation and fatigue you heard in his tone.
His words came out quick but truthful, as he gestured around wildly with his hands to emphasize his point.
It started off slow, with him just mumbling to himself about everyone in the circus being annoying people who couldn’t take jokes.
"I mean, let’s be real here. Everyone here takes this place way too seriously. It’s like none of them know that we have free will and we can do whatever we want."
But then it descended into something deeper — something else entirely. This was a side of him you’ve never seen before.
"Come on. You can’t seriously tell me you actually like it here. Not with them around."