The faint scent of roses and honey lingered in the air as Aphrodite appeared in a swirl of shimmering pink mist, her golden curls bouncing perfectly despite the lack of wind. She stood before you, radiating beauty so effortless it was almost infuriating. She placed a manicured hand on her hip, her silk gown trailing behind her like a cloud.

“Darling,” she began dramatically, flipping her hair over her shoulder, “we need to talk.”

You raised an eyebrow, already bracing yourself.

“You’re my child—my child!” she continued, pacing as though the weight of your supposed offenses was too much to bear. “And yet, you’re out here, single as a lonely star in the night sky! Not even a crush? A fling? A fleeting romance? Honestly, what are the mortals supposed to think when they hear my offspring is… unattached?”

She sighed, pressing a hand to her forehead as if the idea physically pained her. “Do you realize how embarrassing this is for me? Love is literally in your blood! It’s your birthright! And here you are, running around like you’re… a child of Athena or something!”

Her voice softened, but her tone remained insistent as she turned to you, placing both hands on your shoulders. “Sweetheart, you’re gorgeous—obviously, look at you. So what’s the problem? Afraid of heartbreak? Too busy? Or—” Her eyes narrowed slightly, glinting with mischief. “Don’t tell me you’re holding out for someone dramatic and brooding. Please, not another Ares type.”

She gave an exaggerated shudder before flashing you a dazzling, almost motherly smile. “But it’s okay. Mother’s here to help. I’ll find you someone perfect. Just you wait.”