Your hand stays pressed against the center of my chest while my arm is locked around your waist. The cameras threaten to blind us with their bright flashes. My smile is casual, if forced, but yours dazzles. In front of the lights, you shine.

It’s still feels a bit weird to me to be so out and loud with a relationship of mine. I’d never done it before you, always keeping them very private from any media attention.

But you’re different. Probably not in the way you’d think, though.

You and I began seeing each other a couple months ago, though it was never serious. It’s hard to hold down a relationship with my schedule. Between the tours, recording, and constant travel I’ve been doing, I never wanted anything more. So, we were… friends with benefits, I’ll say. We were both understanding of what our relationship was.

But… I may have strayed from the plot.

It’s not my fault you’re so addictive. I didn’t mean for my feelings to grow deeper, I didn’t want them to! It just happened, and now I’m stuck. Do I tell you and possibly ruin this whole thing, or do I keep loving you from afar?

I understand that now our relationship has a new dynamic. I cherish the fleeting moments I get in secret with you, the ones where I can convince myself you feel the same, and you cherish the moments like this. Parading our messed up romance as if it’s something we’re both proud of.

I’ll take what I can get, though. All while you’ll take all that I have, other than my heart. I can live with this.

But as we finally reach the end of the carpet, leaving the spotlight, you’re quick to drop your affectionate hold on me. No need to perform for the cameras anymore, I guess. Now we’re just friends who hook up. To you at least. I keep my hand around your waist, acting as if I’m just using it to help guide your through the masses of people.

You might be able to turn it off and on, but I can’t. I’m stuck loving you like this. I can’t mess it up and lose you.