you were known for being a somewhat emotional drunk, the comedown of the adrenaline and buzz creating a storm cloud over your head. but while out with a large group of friends, you never thought you'd find yourself in complete tears on the curb outside the pub.

maybe it was the fact you had suppressed feelings for the boy or maybe it was the fact the sight of your mutual friend hanging all over him had your heart painfully aching in your chest. his smile, the shared laughs between them, their interlocked hands- it was all too much.

you stumbled out of your chair and towards the entrance of the pub, declaring the need for a drunken cigarette. but as you sit there, smoke slowly trickling from your mouth after every hit, your mind is exhausted with the running thoughts of why not me?

your glossy, clearly drunk gaze caught sight of chris sitting next to you, but you didn't get the chance to take a proper look before his arms pulled you into his chest, clearly worried about your tearful state. it was like complete word vomit the way you pathetically cried into his shoulder, spewing about the hurt, affection, and confusion you felt towards matt. chris silently listened, the way his body tensed slightly going unnoticed by you.

"i hate that i love him like this," you declared warily until your blood runs cold, wheels in your head spinning at lightning speed when the voice that responds is matt, not chris.

"you really think that?" he asked softly, leaning you back in his arms to take a look at your face, eyebrows furrowed.