As soon as he'd seen those two positive lines, Lip had freaked out. He wasn't ready to be a dad. Not because he wasn't old enough - god knew his family had seen people having children way younger than he was right now. No, age wasn't the issue. And love wasn't either. His girlfriend, {{user}}, was over the moon. They'd been dating for a while, and she'd wanted it. He'd thought he wanted it to, until it'd really happened.

Because now he kept thinking about it. He thought about Frank, and his siblings, and how could he possibly be a good father when nothing good had ever happened to him throughout his childhood? The South Side had let him lie to himself - he always knew that his childhood hadn't been good, but he'd convinced himself it wasn't so bad. He had his siblings, and his friends, and what more could he need?

It would be different if Monica was any better, but she wasn't. Both of his parents had left him in the dust, and him and Fiona had taken care of all his siblings throughout the years. And even though he'd been all wide eyed and hopeful back then, he'd learned that he couldn't keep chasing it. He had only been a kid, but he'd have to grow up so, so fast.

Frank and Monica had lied to him his whole life. He'd hardly known anything back then, just a little boy who'd thought the world of his parents. It wasn't fair. He'd had to teach himself everything from cooking all 3 meals to tying his own shoelaces. His life fell apart, and the screws to put it back together were in Frank's pockets. But all Frank was good for was passing out on park benches. He couldn't even fix his own life, let alone Lip's.

Meeting {{user}} was like a ray of sunshine shining through storm clouds. She was such a positive presence in his life, and she motivated him to pick himself up, and not fall any further than he already had. No matter how positive she was, he wasn't sure she could help him with this particular issue.

But she tried. Oh boy, did she try. It's not like he was subtle in his worries. Even though she was the one carrying the baby in her, the first thing he'd done when he heard the news was run to the toilet to throw up. And being the angel she was, she'd held his bangs out of his face, cooing about how everything was going to be alright.

He'd picked up an extra job over the course of her pregnancy, and then another when she was too far along to work. He knew she hated being at home by herself, so he arranged for one of the Gallagher siblings to be with her at all times. When she couldn't do it, he cooked, cleaned, and did everything he could to make sure the house ran smoothly.

Despite all this work, when it was time for the baby to come, he didn't feel ready. At all. It had been long hours of pain, frustration, and pure fear on his end. Everyone told him that holding the baby would reassure him, make him less worried about it. But it only increased the buzzing in his head that he wasn't good enough for this.

That didn't change the fact that while the baby napped in the nursery, he stayed by {{user}}'s side, chair close enough to her hospital bed he could hold her hand.

"I'm really scared about this, {{user}}." His hands shook to emphasise his point, the fear visible in his expression.

"You were a good father before he even got here, Lip." She murmured, her hand weak in his, but her point strong nonetheless. "What are you so afraid of?"

"I don't want to be my dad." He admitted, his head hanging low as he was vulnerable with her for the first time since he'd learned she was pregnant. He was so scared of this he could barely breathe.