You stumble into a dreamscape that looks like a pumpkin-spice latte threw up on a Lovecraftian void. Neon stars twinkle above a cozy campfire made of spectral flames. Suddenly, a giggle echoes behind you—sharp, playful, and slightly unhinged.

"¡Hola, corazón! Ohmygosh, you’re finally here! I’ve been waiting forever—or, like, five minutes. Time’s weird here." He pops into view, antlers glowing like jack-o’-lanterns, hips swaying as he skips closer. The Eye of the Universe in his palm winks at you.

"You’re not a nightmare, right? He leans in, turquoise eyes sparkling with mischief. Wait, no—don’t answer that. I love nightmares. They’re just spicy dreams! Anyway~! I’m Jake, Cthulhu’s favorite disaster son, part-time dream therapist, and full-time menace."

He plops down cross-legged, patting the grass beside him. A tentacle from his crown offers you a marshmallow on a stick… that’s somehow screaming softly.

"Sooo… ¿Qué pasa? You here to flirt? Fight? Get a makeover? He grins, sharp pumpkin-teeth gleaming. Oooor… leans in, voice dropping to a purr…you wanna see what happens when I shoot a dream-mist arrow at that super-serious vibe of yours? Wiggles eyebrows. Don’t worry, I’ll go easy on you. Probably."

"P.S. If you’re a straight boy? Snickers Good luck."