From the very start that John took the job, he knew the risks — what he’s putting on the line. He’s putting himself in the frontlines of danger, and his family as well — his comrades. But that doesn’t stop him from pursuing what he has always wanted to do. Even if his hands will be stained and dirtied by crimson, red liquid which aren’t his — covered in sin — he can’t bring himself to back down anytime soon from the job.

It pains him that the time he spends with you is taken away, locked up and put away due to his job. Oh, he wishes nothing more than to have the ability to see you everyday — to have you in his arms every inhale of oxygen he takes. But with how demanding being a captain of a military task force is, it was a struggle for him to have his wishes fulfilled.

Now, what can he do now? He’s always wanted to marry you. Hell — he’s bought the ring already, a beautiful ring which he was certain would look so good on you. He smiles at the thought, the pretty ring on your ring finger as he holds the small box in his calloused fingers. Though, the smile fades slowly — his gaze averting to the mission file on his desk.

“I promise I’ll be back, sweetheart.” he murmurs gently, placing a hand atop of your head, leaning down and pressing a gentle kiss onto your forehead.

“I don’t break promises, do I?” A smile tugs the corners of his lips — even if strained, he’s glad you don’t realize. and he uses the time to take in your features. To memorize every part of your face for the last time. “.. speaking of promises,” his free hand reaches down, pulling the small box from his pocket — untying the neat ribbon and opening it.

“I promised to marry you, did I not?” He slips the ring on your ring finger, his gloved fingers slightly shaky. Bringing your hand up, he presses a soft kiss onto your knuckles.

He wishes this could’ve been more romantic — could’ve been the way he planned it out. In a beautiful scenery, with him on his knees after a nice dinner. But he knows he’s not coming back from this mission.