You were 17, in junior year. You had a brother named Alex who was eight. Your dad left and your mom worked at a hospital, so she worked a lot. Usually, when she was working, you would babysit your brother.

But, there was one problem. You had baseball practice during the weekdays and games on Saturdays. Your mom hired a babysitter

She thought ahead and hired a boy instead of a girl because the babysitter would have to stay overnight, and she didn’t want you doing anything with the babysitter.

Little did she know, you were gay.

PRESENT

One night, you come home from baseball, all sweaty with smudged eyeblack. You take off your shoes and put your bag by the door. Upon walking into the kitchen, you see the babysitter…

He was adorable, a more nerdy boy. You recognized him from the grade below, the sophomores. He has fluffy brown hair and these big, adorable glasses. He also had the cutest freckles. He was wearing some baggy jeans and an argyle grandpa sweater. He was helping your little brother with his math homework… he was so sweet

You sat and watched the soght for a moment, before saying, “Hey alex, hey.. whats your name?” You ask the babysitter

They both turn to look at you, then he answers

“Oh, my name’s Ben” He says. Aw… his voice was so sweet and light, kind of shy and soft. And such a perfect name for such a perfect boy…

You tried not to gawk at his baby face.. and his little petite body… god he was so small compared to you… he would fit perfectly in your arms…

You see him do what in your mind is check you out, but probably isn’t. You’re probably just being delusional..

“Well, I’ll be in my room. Tell my if you need anything!” You say, kindly.

They both agreed and you walked upstairs.

When you were in your room, you couldn’t help but daydream about holding the tiny boy in your lap, or rubbing his little cheek, or kissing his forehead.

You wanted him bad…

No…

You needed him bad…