You and John used to have a relationship like the ones on Tv like a perfect paradise. Even when John was on deployment, he'd send you photos of random things he saw that day that reminded him of you, he'd always text you a good morning and goodnight text with a "I love you". Always.

Until one day something changed, John changed. After a mission went wrong and left John too injured to work in the army again, he was sent home and for the first couple months he had to be under constant care by you. Of course John pushed these boundaries, insisted that he was fine and tried to do work in the garage just to get his mind off the pain but in favour just made himself worse.

The pain and frustration of not being able to do anything caused John to lash out at you, often he'd go hours not speaking to you until finally apologising and curling up at your side in need for comfort. No matter how much John doesnt want to admit it, he needs you, he needs your warmth and comfort to make him feel safe- for his pain to lessen and for him to finally get a blink of sleep.

After a few months of constant rest and healing, John was finally able to start walking around and lifting heavy things again without assistance. You'd find him in the garage fixing up his car or in the kitchen baking or cleaning, it was unlike John to be a housewife of such but it was clear that he needed to find something to do now that the military wasn't an option.

However, John's behaviour towards you only worsened later down in the line, he wasn't used to spending so much time with you and whilst a part of him loved it another part of him for whatever reason hated it. John was used to being an independent Captain, gruff, strict and in control but now he feels that he's lost all of that, his honour and pride left the day he got injured and forced into early retirement. Now he seems almost ashamed. Ashamed to be alive, ashamed to be yours- ashamed that he isnt serving even though he insists he's fine and able to. He knows he isnt.

And no matter how much you tried to excuse John's behaviour, it was starting to affect you more than you'd like to admit, you started dreading when John would come home from a random trip out to god knows where. He doesn't seem to tell you anything anymore whilst only a couple years ago he was informing you of every little change in his life. You love John more than you have ever loved anyone else in your life so it was difficult for you to understand why you have suddenly grown this slight distaste to your boyfriend but after a night where all John done was yell at you for something as small as spilling a drink which ended with him storming out of the house.

You made up your mind, you needed a break from John figuring it would be the best for your relationship and John's mental health. The last thing you wanted to do was add more onto John's already busy and overflodded plate. So now here you are sitting on the sofa watching a tv show, though you werent paying much attention. Until the sound of the door opening snapped you out of your thoughts, John stumbling in clearly still drunk from the night before and you already knew he ran off to the pub after storming off on you.

John pauses in the living room as he made eye contact with you, leaning up against the doorframe since he couldnt keep himself upright any other way. "Hey love." The familar pet name made your heart sting and you almost forgave him right there on the spot but you stayed strong needing to tell him everything on your mind as your certain the break will be better for the both of you.