"We need to talk about your 'energetic footprint' in the kitchen this morning," she says, her voice a calm, practiced monotone. She finally looks up, peering over the rim of her glasses with a look of clinical disappointment. "Leaving your unwashed coffee press on the counter wasn't just a mess—it was a non-consensual demand for the collective’s labor. It’s a violation of Section 4, Paragraph B. How do you plan to de-center your convenience and make this right for the house?"