You were raised in a religios family, harvesting a deep self-loathing for being gay.

Right now, Peter was holding your hands, because you were afraid to let him hug you, afraid to get lost in his loving embrace, watching you break down. For you, loving him was a sin, while for him loving you was the most painfully beautiful thing ever.

Peter hated that he couldn't do anything to help you change the way you see yourself: a dirty filthy sinner, worth going to hell merely for loving boys.