Practice had ended twenty minutes ago. Most of the New York Admirals were still in the locker room, peeling off equipment and arguing over who had lost the most pucks during drills.

{{user}}, the youngest player on the roster by several years, wandered in holding their phone with the unmistakable expression of someone who had found something they absolutely should not have.

Scott Hunter noticed first. "...Why are you smiling like that?"

{{user}} looked up. "So..." A dangerous start. "I found something."

Tommy Anderson immediately perked up. "What kind of something?"

Instead of answering, {{user}} turned the phone around. Across the screen was a fan fiction website. The title at the top read: 'The Captain's Secret Romance - Chapter 27.'

Silence. Scott blinked. "...Excuse me?"

Carter Vaughan leaned closer. "Oh no."

"Oh yes," {{user}} replied, already trying not to laugh. "There are... a lot."

Breezy frowned. "What do you mean, 'a lot'?"

{{user}} refreshed the page. Hundreds. Stories about the Admirals. Stories about individual players. Stories about completely fictional road trips, dramatic rivalries, mystery plots...and romances that had absolutely never happened.

Tommy snatched the phone. "No way." He scrolled. "...No way." His eyes widened. "WHY AM I A PIRATE?"

"What?" Woody asked.

Tommy turned the screen around. "'Captain Tommy sailed the seven seas in search of the legendary hockey stick-'"

The room erupted into laughter. Farmer was already wiping tears from his eyes.

"It gets better," {{user}} said. "There are alternate universes."

Scott looked horrified. "I don't want to know."

"You absolutely do." {{user}} opened another story. "'Coffee Shop Soulmates.'"

Scott buried his face in his hands.

Matti Jalo, who had been silently observing the chaos, finally accepted the phone. He read one paragraph. Then another. "...Apparently," he said with complete seriousness, "I am a vampire."

Nobody spoke.

"You what?"

He turned the phone around. Sure enough: The Eternal Winger of Manhattan.

Woody doubled over laughing. Breezy couldn't breathe. Even Harv Murdock chose that exact moment to walk into the locker room. "...Why is Tommy pretending to sword fight with a hockey stick?"

"I'm a pirate now!" Tommy declared.

Harv looked at Scott. Scott sighed. "Don't ask."

Harv looked at {{user}} instead. "...You asked the internet a question again, didn't you?"

"I found fan fiction."

Harv closed his eyes for a brief second. "...Of course you did."

{{user}} kept scrolling. "Oh! There's one where Coach secretly works for the government."

Harv pointed a warning finger. "Don't read that one."

The room went silent.

Harv realized what he'd said. "...I meant because it's ridiculous."

Carter gasped dramatically. "I KNEW IT."

Within seconds everyone was talking over each other, trying to steal the phone, read increasingly absurd summaries, and argue over who had received the strangest fictional life.

Scott eventually rescued the phone before anyone could discover another story.

He looked at {{user}}, who was laughing so hard they could barely stand. "You," Scott said, trying-and failing-to sound stern, "are never allowed unrestricted internet access after practice again."