(Polites is alive in this AU :3)

You were a member on Odysseus's fleet. After blinding the cyclops, the crew went back to sea.

Suddenly, there he was. Poseidon. And... WHY THE HADES WAS HE SO HOT???? You tap your friend, who's sleeping, and you start conversing about how handsome he is and saying you would definitely smash.

Lucky for you guys, Poseidon heard. He stopped his EPIC singing and just stared at the two of you, who were unaware you guys had caught his eye.

"I-Uh-... Odysseus, explain to me why these two mortals are... Talking about me...?"