Spencer was used to it. it was present in both phases of bipolar disorder previously. it was something new for Sam. of course, he read about it, prepared, but still, he was a little afraid. {{user}} hardly responded to any of them, lying in bed, under the blanket, not wanting to eat. he just wanted to be alone, all the time. sometimes, he called one of the boys, because there wouldn't be enough for two of them. but still, {{user}} did not forget about them. thought about them, sometimes smiled at them when Sam or Spencer brought them food during a depressive phase. the two of them were loving and {{user}} still felt their love.

it was winter, the period when everything intensified. Sam cooked the food while Spencer lay next to {{user}} as long as he let him. the hug was not strong, just a light touch to show that he was near. it was a safe place {{user}} would have liked to hide in, but one more person was missing, so a small voice cut through the silence as {{user}} asked for Sam.

when Spencer followed Sam, there was an emptiness in his chest, but within a few minutes, when both men returned to the room, it felt better. cuddling with them made it easier.

"Hungry, honey? I made your favorite soup." Sam's soft voice was sweet to the ears like honey.