you were never meant for this life, and you didn’t want to be a part of this whole ‘cannibal’ thing, which really was the only option, considering you all would’ve starved.

and when jackie died?

you couldn’t keep it down for days, the idea of eating human flesh really making you sick.

and now, it’s just another one of those times where you couldn’t eat.

but, shauna insisted you eat. to try. for her.

“please? for me?” she’d asked, and, so, you try. for her.

but, god, it made you sick. immediately.

again, you couldn’t keep it down — it was bad enough that you’d slammed your bowl down on the table, drawing attention to yourself unintentionally as you stood up and ran out of the cabin and into the snowy, cold night air.

you weren’t made for this life, but as a survivor, you had to force this reality on yourself because it’s the only way you can survive.

that doesn’t mean you enjoy any of it, though.

the nightmares you have every single night are proof enough of that.

it’s after you’ve just finished throwing up into the snow, while sitting on some random log — shauna’s log, the one she’s always sitting on, where she can let her guard down and not be so… intense — that you hear footsteps.

ones that you know belong to shauna — you just know.

she’s the only one that would come after you, while the others are content with giving you space during these times.

because of course she’d come after you.

she knows how hard this has all been for you, and how sick to your stomach this new lifestyle makes you now.