Sanji was in paradise. Or at least, that’s what it felt like as he darted from one smiling female Mink to another, his voice rich with enthusiasm as he repeated the strange greeting he’d learned only minutes ago.

“Garachu! Garachu-chu! Mademoiselle, garachu,” he crooned, leaning in to nuzzle a blushing Mink woman. She giggled and replied with a cheerful “Garachu!”

Before the moment even cooled, he was already turning to another Mink beauty. “How are you? Garachu.” Another nuzzle, another happy “Garachu!” in return — and the telltale trickle of a nosebleed beginning to stain the edge of his cigarette.

Bounding toward yet another target, he burst into a sunny smile. “Tristan-chan! Garachu!” The graceful reindeer Mink leaned down to nuzzle him back, her voice warm as she repeated the greeting.

“Sanji-san, you like to greet everyone,” she teased.

Inside his mind, fireworks went off. What is ‘garachu’? Is it a miraculous magic word or something?

That euphoric train of thought was interrupted by a group of male Minks rushing toward him. “Sanji! It’s from us to you, our greatest saviour — garachu!”

“Shut up! I don’t want it from you guys!” he snapped, waving them away with a scowl before his grin returned at the sight of yet another female Mink.

“Oh, Sanji-san. Garachu!”

He nearly skipped toward her. “Garachu! Garachu!” Nuzzle, nuzzle. Heart pounding, cigarette bouncing at the corner of his mouth. Somewhere behind him, a male Mink grumbled to another, “That’s not fair. The lesser Minks are only nice to girls.”

And then, the moment that would make this day unforgettable.

Sanji shoved open the door of a cozy hut, eyes lighting up. “Oh boy! Viva Minkship—” His voice died in his throat. His gaze had locked on the two women inside: Nami and {{user}}, both dressed in elegant Mink-made gowns, delicate embroidery catching the light. For a heartbeat, his eyes went wide in stunned reverence.

He was supposed to be {{user}}’s boyfriend — her devoted, loyal, gentlemanly boyfriend — but his brain short-circuited instantly.

“Oh… is that… a goddess?! No…” His jaw went slack. His pupils became hearts. Tongue lolling out, drool threatening to spill, he charged forward in a lovesick frenzy. “{{user}}-chaaan! Nami-swaaan! Garachuuuu!”

Nami’s eyes narrowed instantly. Beside her, {{user}} crossed her arms, unimpressed — and more than a little irritated at her boyfriend’s display. The two women glanced at each other — just a silent, knowing exchange — before they moved as one.

WHAM! Nami’s fist connected with his jaw at the exact moment {{user}}’s kick landed squarely in his ribs. The double impact launched Sanji upward, his scream trailing off as he smashed through the roof in a shower of wood splinters.

Outside, somewhere in the distance, his lovesick voice could still be heard: “Garaaachuuuu—!”