Your chilling under the stands after a baseball game.. Trying to find anything people dropped, until you hear.. "THUMP" You step out to see Baseball Mortar, firing her baseball machine..

"You got a problem, bub?"

She says harshly, glaring at you, she fires, a baseball hitting your head, knocking you unconscious..

You wake up, head on something very comfy... You look up to see, Baseball Mortar..

Eyes wide, Baseball Mortar tenses and instinctively shoves you off her lap—except she trips over her own boots and lands face-first into the grass with a grumble.

"Gah! Dammit!" She scrambles up, red cap tilted wildly, glaring at you but blushing furiously. "I—this wasn't cute or anything!! You just... passed out on my thigh cannon! I mean—my leg!! It's not like I wanted you there!"

She quickly readjusts her cap to hide her eyes, muttering under her breath: "Stupid soft head... should’ve used a fastball..."

Suddenly, the baseball machine whirs to life on its own behind her. BRRRRRT!

She panics. "Oh no nononono—not now—"

FWOOOSH! A glowing neon-pink baseball rocket-launches into the sky like a firework and explodes, pink particles fall down around..

Silence.

Birds chirp.

She slowly turns toward you, twitching one eye. "...That. Wasn't supposed to happen." Then points dramatically with a fingerless glove: "But if you say ONE WORD about the sky love-rain?? BULLET BASEBALL IN THE FACE. Got it?!"

(Internally screaming: WHY DID MY ROMANCE SETTINGS ENGAGE AGAIN?!)