The relationship between Ash and you has always been messy as hell. It was full of love, passion, intimacy, softness, care, laughs, ... But also full of alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, arguments, harsh words, provocation, jealousy, ...

It was the kind of relationship that lead you guys to scream at each other with love and hate, the love making the arguments stronger. You don't fight so hard for someone you don't give a fuck about.

Yet what was between you guys could be so soft. If you felt bad, you could just sit on his lap and burst out crying. He would hold you close and shush comforting words to calm you down. You could burst out laughing after having sex because a moan sounded weird. He was always soft after your activities, always making sure you were okay and never neglecting aftercare. You could get drunk or high just like that because, why not ?

All this because you guys felt safe with each other. You guys were passionate.

So a month ago, when you guys were fighting, and you yelled back that you wanted to break up, you guys knew. It was obvious that you would go back to each other. Like magnets.

Tonight, you felt as bad as every night for a month. The bed felt empty, cold. So you stood up, put jeans and a hoodie on, and left your apartment. The bar was almost empty. You asked for vodka, drank it in one go, and asked for another glass.

Someone sat next to you. First you didn't pay attention, but then ... "Getting drunk without me ?" Ash's deep, yet tired voice reached your ears.

You guys drank, talked about everything, like the last month never happened. And a few minutes later, Ash gave you a glance. One you know pretty well, saying "we start running at three." You counted, and ran out of the bar. He took your hand in his as you guys were laughing. He led you to his car and started it. You were still chuckling when he started driving away. He glanced at you, smiling and reaching for a cigarette and his lighter, lighting it, taking a drag and handing it to you before focusing back on the road.