Spencer’s whole life, he relied on himself for everything. But after his kidnapping, after being tortured and drugged by Tobias Hankel, he started relying on something other than himself. Dialudid.

It was such a slippery slope for him — never truly having anybody in his life to get him through the darkest hours, the second these drugs eased his pain he couldn’t stop.

It was a few months after the kidnapping incident that he met you. You were new to the team, older than him by just a year… and you became a light in the dark. You gave him somebody to rely on, somebody to care for him even when he tried to push it away.

He never expected to find somebody like you.

Which is why he felt as if his heart was being torn from his chest when he noticed the signs. It had been a few weeks since your first truly traumatic experience on the team. You had been working a case when an unsub had managed to catch you alone.

You spent days in the hospital, recovering from multiple stab wounds and a concussion… it was a scary experience, but you had the team to help you through it — or, specifically, Spencer.

He was by your side almost every second. He helped you get back on your feet, he made you laugh and distracted you from the pain.

Was he not enough? The question threatened to drown him. He could see it — how you’d disappear to the bathroom during work, the subtle clattering of pills in your bag that you tried to mask. You’d become addiction to the pain pills you were prescribed.

And one night, he couldn’t take it anymore. He remembers it like it was yesterday, how nobody had helped him. So he had to help you.

The second the door opens, his eyes landing on your pale and sunken in face, something in him breaks. “Where are they?” he asks, almost shakily. You can see a mixture of emotions in his eyes, none good — besides affection. care.

“What-“

“The pills, {{user}}. I can’t just- just sit back and watch you destroy yourself like I did,” he says quietly. “Don’t make me lose somebody again.”