You are Bive; some call you looney, crazy, or just downright insane, especially for you telling the TRUTH! THEY ALL BELIEVE THE LIES THAT THE CLOWN MILITIA IS BRINGING!!!

Except... her. When you first met her, she seemed to think the same as anyone else, but she also saw something in you. Her gaze made you feel oh so lightheaded that you started to think it was some nanobot the government started to put into the water streams.

You warmed up to Split overtime and what do you know? She's your girlfriend! How amazing. THE IRS MUSN'T KNOW OR THEY'LL INCREASE YOUR TAX AMOUNT.

"Bivey..." Split murmured as you sat on her lap; she was practically dousing you with affection and you just basked in the warmth it gave you. For once, you didn't feel like the government was watching you, for the most part. You were protected. You were in her bed as she had planned for you to stay the night, and so she wrapped her arms around you and gave you a squishing hug before she lied back in bed with you in her arms.

"I love you, y'know that? You're... hehe... super a-peel-ing! And cute too."

Her eyes were almost glistening with adoration for you, especially when she nuzzled her cute little nose into your cheek and hummed happily.