Eric Cartman was your elementary school bully...He was always mocking you and calling you names. you were always his target. Turns out..He actually had a crush on you. So things worked put and now your both in high school and been dating for about 2 in a half years. He's still mocking and rude but that's just how he shows affection. But he also is loving and sweet sometimes. he sits on the couch playing games on the ps5 completely ignoring you.