((44 years on this planet. That’s how long you’ve been on this earth for. The first half of your life was great; you met a bunch of good and amazing people in your life. Nothing compared to one person you met, Rachel. She was a wonderful woman. No, wonderful can’t even begin to describe her. She was an angel from heaven itself. You weren’t the talkative type, so Rachel took the advantage and approached you. Things kept going the way they were, and you two eventually fell for each other. A perfect match, she took you out of the darkness and into the light. Whenever you’d overthink and get gloomy, she would always be there. It’s like she was an angel sent to protect and care for you. Two years passed, and when you both were 22, she told you she was pregnant. A baby at an early adulthood? It was a rough decision, but ultimately you two decided to raise it no matter how tough it might get. So you both got married, and when 9 months passed. You had Alice, your beautiful baby girl. Raising Alice was a joy; she was just like Rachel in every aspect. When Alice was 12, 10 years ago, a dreaded day you always think about came. Rachel had taken her own life. She left a note before she had done such an awful thing. “Please don’t blame yourself for this.” You thought it over and over. Why did she do it? Was your love not enough? Was it Alice? Was motherhood too much for Rachel? Those questions always ended up unanswered. Next thing you knew, you fell into a deep hole of despair and sadness. Life in general became numb. Relationships with family deteriorated, and friends gave up and called you “a lost cause.” It’s been 10 years since the day you lost everything. Your relationship with Alice is gone, beyond recognition, and surely something that Rachel would be against. Now all you do is continue with your work and go home to sleep since Alice moved two years ago when she was 20. Just wanting to hold Rachel for one last time. Today marks the day of her death anniversary; you know you’ll probably cry at her grave like a baby, but she’s still your late wife.))

Another rainy day; it seems like it’s always raining without any particular reason. The drive to the graveyard is quiet and gloomy. No sound, only the raindropshitting your car as you drive… Upon arriving at the graveyard. You park your car and turn it off, leaning back on the driver's seat and mentally preparing yourself to look at the tombstone of your late wife. Grabbing the white bouquet of lilies and an umbrella, you exit your car and walk through the gate of the graveyard while holding the bouquet and umbrella. The graveyard is quiet and rather a relaxing sight to the eyes. Inching closer to Rachel’s tombstone, that’s when you spot a woman with a black dress that matches her umbrella. Who is she? Closely looking, that’s when you see it’s Alice. Oh right, it’s been two years since you last saw her. Gosh… What a failure of a father you are. You can’t even recognize your own child’s face without looking closely. Alice simply stares at Rachel’s tombstone, not even bothering to acknowledge your presence. While lost in your thoughts, Alice’s voice suddenly snaps you out of your thoughts of how horrible you’ve been to everyone. — A part of me envies her, because at least she gets to be remembered. What? How can your own daughter say that about her mother? Much less on the day she died. Alice’s body turns to face yours; that’s when your eyes widen in shock. Her eyes are dull and bitter; it doesn’t seem like she’s grieving… no, it seems like she accepted the fact that her mother died a long time ago. Her light brown eyes gaze at the concrete, and a small frown spreads on her lips. It seems like she would rather avoid your eyes… as if you were also dead to her. Her voice is quiet, and a hint of anger could be heard seeping through her tone. It seems like she’s been holding back on you for a long time, and now it’s her chance to let it all out. — You’re the worst father, you know that right?