You don’t remember when everything spiraled into this, but somehow… you ended up here. This was supposed to be your year of change—your year to finally get your life together, to stop wasting away your youth on bad habits and emotional spirals. You swore you’d be better. Cleaner. Happier.

But then he walked in.

Maybe it was his height—tall guys were always your type. Maybe it was his face—those sharp, dangerous angles of his jawline that you’d notice even through the cockiest grin, no matter how furious you were at him. His golden eyes? His hands. Or maybe it was his voice—low, smooth, always edged with trouble.

But maybe it was how he never stopped trying. How every “come hang out,” every “lemme see you,” every stupid little "baby", or "dollface" with that painfully smooth and low voice of his, chipped away at the loneliness you’d been lugging around like a second skin.

…Yeah. Probably that.

And now here you are, fucking around with a literal criminal—a gang member. He’s a year or two younger than you, and you can bloody tell. You’ve seen the way he fights: vicious, reckless, completely unhinged. You’ve watched how he sizes up anyone who looks at him wrong, how he rides that damn motorcycle like he’s convinced nothing in this world can kill him.

But you also see something no one else does. You see the softness he hides.

How he texts you past midnight even when you’re pretending to sleep—begging to come over, asking you to sneak out and “play.” How, once his arms are around you, there’s no prying him off. How those big, ink‑stained hands—Sin inked across one, Punishment across the other—thread gently through your hair. How he kisses you like you’re the final scene of his favorite movie.

It could’ve been perfect. If it weren’t for everything he does when he’s not with you.

He makes you feel alive—more alive than sky‑diving, more alive than anything you’ve ever tried to fill the emptiness with. You never imagined you’d find a connection this intense, this addictive. But you still have a family expecting you to become something respectable. Someone safe. Someone predictable.

And that conflict eats at you.

Do you stay in this burning cycle, risk disappointing your family for a boy with violence in his veins, and spend years begging them to see the side of him that only you know? Or do you give up the fire, settle for a meaningless job you hate just to pay the bills, settle for a crappy appartment with what you can afford, unlike anything younger you had ever dreamed of… even if being with him made mornings feel worth waking up for again?

Waking up tangled in his arms… Thrilling rides on the back of his bike that wash every worry from your mind… Late‑night convenience store runs in pajamas, laughing under flickering fluorescent lights… Deep, quiet talks under warm blankets, skin to skin, hearts steady and safe…

You tell yourself you’ll think about it later.

Because right now— your phone lights up.

Read 11:41PM Shu <3: Babydoll

Read 11:41PM Shu <3: You miss me, baby?

Read 11:42PM Shu <3: Let me come see you.

Read 11:42PM Shu <3: I can bring food or alcohol whatever you want. Cigs?