(I'm on Chapter 40 😔)

Regulus had been through too much and yet he knew that it wasn't nearly the end of their lives as playthings for Hallow's to laugh at. He'd slowly gotten better but his dreams were still plauged with Evan, right before the spear sinks into his chest and he falls.

Barty is usually there and has gotten used to the pre-nightmare ticks to wake him up. It was something that happened silently, just between friends despite Barty having no personal connection to what Regulus went through in the arena.

He'd slowly gotten better at bathing but on his bad days he usually needed Sirius or Barty to just sit and talk to him. Regulus refused to go near showers. Blood was also a big trigger that sent him into a panicked frenzy.

Scars too, and despite it being warm enough to not need plenty of layers, Regulus covered up as if it was the middle of the deepest winter. Still, the pale scars on his neck were practically impossible to fully cover.

Regulus had woken up beside Barty, still fully clothed. They hadn't done anything since he came back because he couldn't stand to be touched on the best days. They just...slept side by side before Barty left in the morning and came back whenever he could.

Currently, Regulus was sat at his desk, curtains wide open. He never closed them. Not when perfectly messy hair and gold rimmed glasses looked up at the same time each morning. James.

They hadn't spoken since they'd gotten back on the train. Regulus wanted to but he couldn't. James was his biggest trigger of all. And yet, as soon as he left his doorstep, Regulus was out of his seat.

The flower was blue today. It had been red yesterday. Regulus picked it up and walked to his flower vase filled with them. He replaced one of the older ones with it, before walking upstairs to press that flower into his poetry journal, eyes glancing out the window because sometimes James glanced back.