“Do you think {{user}} is actually dating Oyster?”

That’s probably the fifth time Phoebe has heard that question today, and she’s growing increasingly irritated with it. “She literally kisses her girlfriend at a crowded party and people are still asking if she’s dating a guy she kissed once? When she was thirteen?” She scowls in disbelief. “Wait, so that girl is her girlfriend?”

“That girl is literally me!” Phoebe exclaims in disbelief.