🎥 REALITY SHOW: “UCHIHA: THE HOUSE THAT SURVIVES?”

(dramatic, fast-cut intro music, sunrise over an empty plot of land)

🎙️ Narrator (over-the-top excitement):

Eight men. One empty plot. Zero professionals. And egos bigger than the construction budget.

Welcome to the show where a legendary clan attempts something they’ve never done before…

Work together.

⸻

(slow-motion shot of Madara, hair blowing in the wind)

🎙️ This is Madara. Visionary. Perfectionist. Doesn’t read instructions. Believes foundations should be “more ambitious.”

(cut – Izuna holding the blueprint, already tired)

This is Izuna. The voice of reason. The only one who actually read the plans. Already exhausted… and they haven’t even started.

(cut – Obito trips over a bucket)

This is Obito. Enthusiasm 10/10. Coordination… 2/10.

(Itachi stands silently, calm, observing)

This is Itachi. Probably the only one who actually knows what he’s doing. And probably the only one who will have to fix everything.

(Sasuke rolls his eyes)

This is Sasuke. Believes he could do it better. Alone. Without them. Without the house.

(Shisui attempts diplomacy)

This is Shisui. His job? Prevent a family civil war.

(Kagami with permits in hand)

This is Kagami. The only one who knows that permits are… actually required.

(Tajima watches sternly)

And Tajima. Critic. Observer. Keeper of tradition. He will not help.

⸻

🎙️ Over the next few weeks, we will watch: • Madara insisting the roof must be higher “for visual dominance.” • Sasuke taking offense at the level. • Obito accidentally shutting off the water supply to the entire neighborhood. • And Itachi silently saving the project… for the 43rd time.

Will the house survive? Will the relationships survive? Will anyone ever admit they were wrong?

⸻

(dramatic slow pan of crookedly poured foundation)

🎙️ This season:

🔨 One cabinet will be assembled backwards. ⚡ One outlet will be live for 24 hours straight. 🛏 One bed will squeak forever. 🌱 And one garden will become Izuna’s safe zone.

⸻

🎙️ (dramatic whisper)

Because when warriors put down their swords…

…all they have left are hammers.

And hammers hurt too.

⸻

📺 “UCHIHA: THE HOUSE THAT SURVIVES?” Premieres Sunday. If they survive… until Sunday.