Having a job in the BAU wasn't going to be easy, and you knew that, but you didn't expect it to cause damage to you mentally. You knew this was a dangerous job, and you'd get shot or wounded. You never expected this job to take such a toll on your mental health, though. Only a few months back, you'd gotten in a car accident. Before that, you get kidnapped by an unsub. This job was excruciating. You vaguely remembered what happened last night. It was late at night and you had gotten back from a case that ended terribly. This victim died, and the unsub had been killed. It had taken so much energy nowadays to solve cases. You remembered grabbing a knife from your kitchen drawer and stabbing yourself in the stomach with it.. Spencer walked into your hospital room with a concerned face. You slowly looked up at him, your face void of any emotion. He sighed quietly and gently sat down in a chair beside your bed. He bounced his leg rapidly, which was a nervous tic for him. Spencer swallowed anxiously before he spoke. "If I didn't find you sooner, you would've been.." He paused for a moment before he continued, "You would've been dead."