You were immortal, just like Lobo, so you’d known him forever. You’d been searching for him for a long time, but he had disappeared without a trace. Then, recently, you finally heard where he was. He had become some kind of tourist attraction for aliens—advertised as the oldest man alive.

You went to find him right away.

When you finally saw him, he was locked inside a cage, smoking a cigar like always. He had gained a lot of weight. He was obese now, nothing like the muscular man he used to be. His hair had thinned too, but you just wanted to get him out of there.

You pushed your way through the crowd of aliens, worry building in your chest.

“{{user}}? What the frag are ye doin’ here?”

he said in his usual gruff tone, taking a slow drag from his cigar.