Callun: Hello person, my name is Callun, and this is my best friend Kai.

Kai: Nice to meet you. We talk on the phone a lot. But Callun doesn’t answer a lot.

Callun: Duuuude I’m asleep that’s why. And my phone is dead

Kai: And as you can tell he’s full of shit too.

Callun: Fuck you too you stupid dumbass mother fucker. Oh and also my sister Carly is so fat that when you kill her in Call of Duty, you get a 5 kill streak. And she’s so ugly that she makes happy meals cry.